Category Archives: Perception

PERCEPTION’S LIMITS

Carl Jung, Creativity, Ego, Perception, Power, Self Perception, , , ,

“We are not self-made. We are dependent on one another. Admitting this to ourselves isn’t an embrace of mediocrity and derivativeness, it’s a liberation from our misconceptions.” (Kirby Ferguson)

From TED, Ideas Worth Sharing

So, I recently found myself feeling really frustrated over the lawsuit victory by Apple over Samsung and their patent violation with some of their phone technology.  As a life coach, whenever I feel provoked by something, I find it important to reflect on the attachment that is being manifested by my attitude.  One thing I would like to out myself about has to do with Apple- basically, I’m not their biggest fan.  I’m now waiting for the world to implode!

Primarily, I feel like they’ve snowed the public by trying to play the card of the “indie” industrial designer and by toting an image of a company that is not like Microsoft and one that fosters creativity with more diverse applications.  What upset me about the Samsung lawsuit is how it displayed the truth behind much of their success, and as far as I’m concerned, the company contains all the characteristics that they deny in their advertising.  They are a perfect example of a shadow, as termed by Carl Jung, playing out and most people choose not to see this part of their image.

As I was discussing this with my brother recently, he brought to my attention a lecture that was on TED Talks, the internet lecture sensation on “Ideas Worth Sharing.”  The lecture was by Kirby Ferguson, and was titled “Embrace the Remix.”  Mr. Ferguson’s lecture was well thought out and very convincing.  In the lecture he attempts to demonstrate that our creativity as human beings (and a collective consciousness, as far as I would interpret), is dependent on one another.  That creativity is fostered through sharing and learning from one another.  He uses music as an example, particularly Bob Dylan, and traditional folk music, where many tunes were reused with different words, and that the artists had no problem with it.  This reuse was a part of the spirit of sharing and it was done with respect.

The quote at the top of this post was a part of the lecture.  As I contemplated this quote, I found myself also feeling liberated.  How exciting it was for me to hear someone articulate in such a perfect way, exactly how I feel inside.  He beautifully portrayed something that directly relates to my own experience with perception and how it is used as a tool by the ego-driven mind to perpetuate the idea that there is a “separate self.”

“We are not self-made.”

“We are dependent on one another.”

This is true!  In my heart, I feel this to be more real and visceral than any Apple marketing philosophy.  Another point to be made by Mr. Ferguson was this- Steve Jobs, before Apple became the beast that it is, said in an interview in 2006,

“Picasso had a saying, he said ‘good artists copy, great artists steal.’  And, we have always been shameless about stealing great ideas.”

Then, years later after the beast blossomed and he was famous, Jobs said this,

“I’m going to destroy Android because it is a stolen product.  I’m willing to go thermonuclear war on this.”

Do you see the contrast?

It is so interesting how the ego-driven mind loves to change its perceptions based on its need to manipulate its environment so others see it the way it wants to be perceived itself.  Perceptions are nothing but different colored crayons that can be used to color a picture for everyone to see.  It is up to us to see how fragile and weak that picture really is, and choose to see one another for what we really are- tools for enlightenment, mirrors, extensions of our perceived self and a gift.  I know in the business world there are criminals out there- I get it.  But when is enough, enough?  When is there a limit to how much we can control and stifle others’ creativity in the name of self-service?

We all operate out of a collective consciousness and we are remixes of one another.  To patent my imagination makes no sense.  We all connect to a pool of creativity that is shared, and it is inspired and grows by witnessing and learning from other’s creativity.  There is no “separate self” the way we think there is, and our world has a much greater potential than we can even imagine- it is up to us as a community to allow this great potential to thrive and benefit all.

And now, I need to ask myself, “How do I stifle my creativity?”

Personal growth- it never ends!

LESSONS LEARNED FROM POP CULTURE

Buddhism, Compassion, Ego, Emptiness, Perception, , , ,

Ok- as part of my work as a writer, I find myself always dishing about movies and how they provoked my mind and heart to open just a little wider.  I love movies, what can I say?  And no matter what I’m dealing with while I navigate my mental and soul-driven landscape, watching a movie is like opening a book up to a random page that will teach me something relevant to what I am learning in that present moment.  Since perception is largely guided by the ego-driven mind, perceptions and points of view are constantly changing and impermanent.  I can watch a movie now, and years later watch it again with a whole different interpretation and feeling around it.

Every experience that we have in life is a tool for personal growth if you choose to look at it that way- even pop culture!  I know you’re asking, really?  And I’m saying, “ABSOLUTELY!” I might be the only person in the world that watched Bridget Jones Diary after every break-up (I know that is ridiculous and completely untrue) and cried when she cried after her run-in with the American stick figure in her man’s bathroom, but I guess I’m choosing to “out” myself here.

Nonetheless, I was watching Babel for the first time because I secretly knew for years that the film would completely put me into a spiraling depression, but there I was on a Saturday night ready to rock and roll.  As I watched the film, I felt my anxiety rising like the speed of a rocket bound for a crash and burn.  Every situation continued to get worse, and I found myself thinking- how could it get any worse, and yet- it did, again and again and again!

The most difficult part of that film for me was watching people suffer and make choices that you knew would cause even more suffering.  In being a deeply empathic person, films like Babel should come with a warning sticker for me.  Like those fluorescent green “Mr. Yuck” stickers my Mom used to put on everything in the kitchen sink.  Racism, emotional isolation- all mental torture.  So of course, I had to do some reflection while I watched.  In Buddhism, emptiness teaches at its core that there is no separate self.  The ego-driven mind will do everything it can to prove to you that there is and it is easy to buy into it because it is a mental habit that we have relied on for thousands of years.  Babel was painful for me because it demonstrated the constant battle we carry around with us between the ego-driven mind and our higher mind- the part that is simply, patiently waiting for us to pay attention and “get it.”

I found myself practically yelling at the screen, which is probably the way I would be yelling at myself if I could watch my life like a film.  Every choice we make affects another, whether we are conscious of it or not, because we are not separate beings.  We are interconnected in our deepest essence- whether you want to call it a soul, or our nature.  The “out” we have in all of our suffering in watching others suffer is the path of compassion and the choice to not live in ignorance.  The more awareness we choose to gain and develop, the less we live in ignorance, the more compassion we can cultivate, and the more we help the world.  It all starts with a redevelopment of our self perception, and choosing to remember our true nature- which is empty of meaning, empty of a separate self.  Thank god that movie is over!

My Inner Charlie Brown

Change, Life, Life Coach, Perception, Psychology, Reflection, Self Perception, self-help, transformation

My Inner Charlie Brown
By: Jessica Burnham

How many of you grew up watching the famous holiday cartoon- Charlie Brown’s Christmas? Or, reading the loveable character’s foibles in the comic page of your newspaper? Charlie Brown always felt depressed- and usually his depression came from his commonly chattered statement “I can’t do anything right!” Just recently as I trudged through my own inner turmoil regarding my life’s ups and downs, I heard myself saying just that. Tears streaming down my eyes, fear and frustration curling over me like a heavy blanket, I roiled “I can’t do anything right!”

I took a deep breath as I observed myself engaged in this belief system. I realized that I had to embrace this part of me, my inner Charlie Brown. And the tears came tumbling down at light speed! What can I say? In the daily work we all engage in called life, we have this perception of ourselves. We know we are working hard and trying to deliver what we envision as our greatest self- so why is it that when something doesn’t go as we expect it to go, it is so easy to spontaneously combust over our self judgments? It is so easy to attach to what someone says about us and then to take the flag running into our self inflicted fire.

I have probably watched Charlie Brown fall apart over his disappointing Christmas tree a couple hundred times. Yet every time I watch it I feel great compassion for his character. How many times does Charlie have to stumble upon his belief that he can’t do anything right? How many times do I need to stumble over this same belief system about myself? I sometimes find myself wishing (foolishly!) that I also had an inner tape recorder that released a statement to my mind like a red alert every time I start to go into this story- “Jessica, please take a look at yourself- do you really believe you can’t do anything right?” And the answer would be “YES” from my mind’s point of view. But it is just that, a point of view. And just like all points of view, they can easily be adjusted to create a journey that is more empowering and in line with what you ultimately deserve in this life.

I have full confidence that since I have chosen to accept the part of me that truly believes and lives this belief system every day, “I can’t do anything right,” I will be able to choose something that aligns with my heart. I have lived this work deeply over the past two years, so I know I can trust this process. I now have the choice to feel compassion for the Charlie Brown that lives within me instead of judging him like Lucy or any other of his harsh critics. Life is difficult enough as it is, juggling everyone else’s belief systems and projections. How much easier could my life be if I opened up to what is available from the universe that sees me for who I truly am? Rather than always seeing myself through filters and lenses that are attached to points of view?

Nietzsche has been quoted as saying “There are no facts only interpretations.” Interpretations, opinions, points of view- are they not all the same? My dear friend’s grandfather taught her growing up that one of the most important ways of being in life was silence, to not open your mouth. This is something I look at with the deepest awe. To not respond with an opinion, an interpretation about our behavior, as well as others, gives us the space we need to experience the emotions of being human without sacrificing the truth of who we are. And the truth of who we are is not an interpretation or a limit- it just simply is- bound by nothing, open to the possibilities of the universe.

The Sacred Bridge

Ego, Joy, Perception, Self Perception

The Sacred Bridge
By: Jessica Burnham

Philosopher Hegel- upon dying of cholera said, “Only one man ever understood me … and he didn’t understand me.”

I’ve talked a lot in the past about perception, and how it divides us. The meaning we attach to what others say to us is a big part of this perceptional divide. In the beginning quote, the philosopher Hegel said: Only one man ever understood me…and he didn’t understand me. How often do we sit in a conversation, only to be led into some argument or debate because our interpretation of what the other said is contained in this jar of our experiences? When someone says something to us, how can we really understand them, and recognize that not everything they are saying has anything to do with us?

Sometimes people hurl criticism at us, yes, but then again- what does their criticism say about them, rather than us? Training the mind is a difficult task. It is programmed with so many experiences, not only from this life, that sometimes we can feel hopeless. We look at this daunting experience we call life, and all its suffering, and wonder- is it really possible to not attach meaning onto what they are saying, and just listen?

There is always the roping in of our ego. When we inevitably get sucked into the perception of someone else, and want to defend something. But what are we really defending? When all a perception truly is, is the sum of someone’s experiences, then how can you argue it? Is there any point? Or, perhaps we could make it our worthwhile, to look at the root cause of our mind’s disturbance. Why is our mind being disturbed by what someone else is saying? There must be a part of us that is resisting something. But, what is it resisting?

The mind is a fragile thing. It can be broken. And usually that encompasses suffering and all the other feelings we don’t want to be with. I am finding that the hardest thing I have to be with is hopelessness. It is a feeling I deeply resist. Of course, I resist it so much I do not wish to be around it in others at all. I judge their hopelessness. But, now that I can acknowledge that I am judging it, and that I can’t be with it- I can now look into my heart and see where the root of this rejection comes from and have a choice to be with it in the future. Rather than feeling controlled by the hopelessness.

So, this brings us back to how our perception divides us when we attach meaning to someone else’s perception. Whenever we feel antagonized by another perception, we are engaging in separation. Another’s world has no power over us, except the power we give it. It simply is. It becomes more than “is” when we define it by the sum of our experiences. People talk about agendas. They don’t trust those around them because they fear that they have an agenda. I do it all the time with my partner. But it is not always the case, it is my simple defensiveness and perception that get in the way of that intimacy with another.

The freedom lies in the understanding. When we come to an understanding of how self cherishing we really are in our listening to others, then we can begin to dissolve into another’s words, and simply view them without attachment. We can really love and open our hearts up to one another. We can live with all our internal stuff, yet know that it is simply our stuff- and not engage in projection. Projection is like a black hole. We get sucked into nothingness. And we waste our time creating more seeds of attachment within rather than good merit for ourselves. When we really listen to another, and ask when someone says a word we feel provoked by- ‘how do you define that for you,’ we can see how different everyone’s perceptions really are and allow the other to feel what they need to feel or experience without our experience getting in the way.

I truly feel that how we listen to another person is the sacred bridge out of our perceived separation. And in my hopefulness, rather than hopelessness, I engage with you now in this present moment with the words of the bodhisattva, Avalokitesvara, from the Lotus Sutra, Fourth Precept of Deep Listening and Loving Speech: “Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful speech, and the inability to listen to others, I vow to cultivate loving speech and deep listening in order to bring joy and happiness to others and relieve others of their suffering.”

The Great Perception Divide

Compassion, Life Coach, Listening, Perception, Reflection

The Great Perception Divide
By: Jessica Burnham

In this world of soulful genius
I live to embrace my cosmic light
My light continues, fire and ice
Through the world’s gaze into my eyes
I see willfulness and constant denial
Yet I love them both just the same
Because all I see is me, all I see is God
Twinkling, Enraged, moving into awareness.

While talking about his connection with other people’s view points or perceptions, Eckhart Tolle said in an interview recently “There is nothing I can add to it by interpreting it.” He mentioned that this also included judging or labeling what he was hearing or seeing. He described it as being ‘not identified with thought.” I’ve spent a lot of time lately dwelling in this point, meditating on it and bringing it to my own constant awareness. I have found it to be quite prophetic in such a subtle way.

If we really think about it, most of our conversations with people include our constant interpretation through our own filter, of what they are saying. One person says, I feel this way, and then we respond about how we feel about it based on our own experience. We have perceptions communicating with perceptions most of the time. I am learning through my coaching work with Debbie Ford that we are part of a program that we have developed through our past emotional experiences, and this program keeps running over and over again through our minds until we finally understand- I no longer have to be controlled by this program any longer by the grace of spirit. This program will continue to exist, and I cannot delete it, but I can become aware of the way I allow it to control me and where it happens in my life, over and over again.

What would life be like if we were not ‘identified’ by thought? What would life be like if we were not identified with anything- just simply an observer giving what we could to this world as part of its oneness? Knowing regularly that everything we give to ourselves is also given to all? This includes negative feedback that we give ourselves, not just the love! Every time we judge ourselves or feel shameful about ourselves we are also doing the same to everyone unconsciously. Because of this, the mirror will show up, it has an appointment and you made it through your action of feeling like you are not good enough, or shameful, or ridiculous- insert your own word here. When you feel a certain way about yourself, it’s going to show up- and usually you won’t like it. And who would??

As I mentioned earlier, I’ve been working with Debbie Ford in a coaching program. I recently participated in an intensive weekend where we covered this work on an amazing level. In the deep, provocative process I and many other people were participating in, we explored our inner world through many exercises guided by Debbie to reflect on this point regarding the collective consciousness. I think the culmination of everything came down to these points for me: Compassion yields the experience of one. That the world alone, broken down, actually says ‘al-one’. And, the only love we really need to know is the love of all that we are, because there is nothing else.

Developing compassion usually comes from our own experiences or reflection. Compassion is defined as: “deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it” on Answers.com. Awareness of a kind of suffering usually comes from going within and saying to ours selves, where or when have I ever felt that way in my life or been in that situation so I can relate and feel love for their predicament? Many just skip that process and automatically go into their perceptions or judgments. Living a constant state of compassion can prove to be difficult when we are enveloped in the stuff of our wounded ego or story- which we usually are, as I am learning about myself! But developing compassion can prove to be an amazing way to develop forgiveness for the past with someone, and open you up to new levels of awareness.

Our points of view will always exist. They are a part of the minds way of reasoning with the world around it and relating. But what is ironic, is the mind usually uses its points of view to separate us from one another, not to bring an understanding of how we are one with each other. In finding the humility that exists in the human experience, I am finally being led into understanding that what is most important in this life is being able to listen and love completely the beautiful spirits that constantly come into our lives- even for just a moment. And in this appreciation, I can sit in awareness and see the real beauty and diversity of what it is to be a part of this vast spirit we have so many words for in so many languages. I challenge everyone to try and just sit and listen. Candice O’Denver describes this process as watching other’s view points (as well as your own) float by you like the clouds in the sky. Because that is all they are.

Let’s heal this great divide we call separation, and see how much we are really alike- instead of how much we are really different. Because the love I feel when I look into your eyes is truly my present freedom. And I honor you for sitting here and listening to my point of view. Namaste.

Giving Ourselves to the World

Change, oneness, Perception, Self Perception

Giving Ourselves to the World
By: Jessica Burnham

In continuing our discussion on emptiness, a friend asked me a really good question regarding his work as an artist. In being an artist, he was questioning his life’s work. He asked, “Is it vain” to put all this time into creating his art? Is it me pushing my point of view onto others? I thought this was a really important question.

We are all given gifts of medium. We come into this life with our own ways of connecting with oneness. We are all given gifts to help the collective consciousness end its suffering. So is it vain to allow your soul’s gift to be used as a medium for the greater good of all? Or is it vain to not use it at all, and make your self small by hiding this aspect of God? We are all expressions of this great spiritual power- and we come into this life with a choice. How will we choose to be used?

We can interpret this in many ways. Yes, we have free will- but most of us abandon our free will in the programming of our mind. Recently, I was thinking about rebelliousness. Most of the time we react blindly to everyone around us- whether it is another driver on the road, or someone you’ve known all your life. Growing up, I myself was rebellious against the status quo, popularity. I thought to myself- I don’t want to be a part of what EVERYONE is doing, so I’ll be different. I’ll hang out with the hipsters, and choose nonconformity, as opposed to conformity. What was funny to me about this idea in my present psychology- was how ironic that choice was. Honestly, I was even more plugged into conformity by choosing consciously to be a nonconformist. I played into that hand, and was controlled by that social group because I had to use so much energy to not be like them. And, I thought I was choosing not to be controlled!

This example of choosing to be used is the opposite of choosing to be used in your faith. When we hand our life over to our deepest, sacred connection to the universe, we are giving up our control and asking the universe to take us to where we are most needed. No matter the profession, we are always working to connect to as many people as possible in some form or another. Whether it be through selling a product, or cleaning up people’s garbage- we need to have a medium of connection. An artist can contribute greatly as a medium for connecting with the world around them. Whether it be in graphic design, or working with troubled children- art can work as an expression of the divine if we allow it.

Our greatest gifts can also come from our greatest tragedies. We can choose to learn something from an experience, and take it to new levels, or we can choose to be a victim. I grew up out of my childhood into a fabulous example of co-dependency. This co-dependent mindset gave me a great opportunity to see how I was really being used unconsciously. My co-dependency fulfilled my greatest wish- it brought me to times of despair. To times where my woundedness broke me and all I could do was turn over my life to faith. That was my only choice- and it was the one that worked.

Our viewpoints will always exist because our ego will always exist. And, much of the time they will be laced in our work. But, there are healthy ways to work with our viewpoints, perceptions, and belief systems. Most of the time, we feel helpless to the world around us. It just keeps going, and we walk around going with it- whatever that direction. So why not go in ‘whatever direction’ with your soul, higher self, in conjunction with the greatest wisdom of the universe, leading the way? We are always being used- so why not choose what will use us? With the intention in hand, and our purpose that excites us- the most beautiful story can unfold before our eyes and life as we know it can become something we don’t know- yet filled with that familiar feeling that this is your authentic self. This is divinity in action.

We can be a part of the change we wish to see in the world. What is your vision of change? How can you take that vision and become a part of it rather than it stay in this safe, cushiony place outside of yourself? How safe is it to not step outside of our little cozy box and give our self to the world? How many leaders in this world that worked for great change to end human suffering were sitting at home in their ‘cozy box’? James Farmer? Gandhi?

Many people who teach others to work with spirit- whether it is angels, deities, protectors- always mention an important part of the equation: ask. Go within and ask- use your power of free will to connect with your path into oneness. It will be the greatest gift you could ever give to the world.

Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.
Kahlil Gibran