Tag Archives: Washington DC

Heartbroken? Keep on Dancing.

June 17, 2016Grief, Life Coachcarl jung, Don McClean, grief, Heartbroken, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAsV5-Hv-7U, Jimmy Fallon, Magnetic Fields, Orlando, Perception, Self Perception, self-love, The Cure, The Day the Music Died, The Guardian, The Shadow, Tracks, Walt Whitman, Washington DCBorn to Be

Recommended Reading Soundtrack: Nothing Matters When We’re Dancing by Magnetic Fields on 69 Love Songs

Right now, my heart is broken. I feel a compelling desire to write about it and connect with all of you who similarly feel the same teary-eyed dinginess that surfaces when you get in your car and turn on the radio, only to be confronted with senseless violence and a loss of life. A moment in time when a celebration of life turned into a final farewell.

They say emotions are the life blood of creativity. When I write, my emotions are definitely a driving force in what I choose to express and share with the world. That’s why some of the best songs, stories or poems are about heartbreak.

And heartbreak comes in many forms. Think Walt Whitman’s “Oh Captain, My Captain.” Or, “The Day the Music Died” and American Pie by Don McClean. I could go on for hours. And I must add for the record- the heartbreak I’m referring to is not a marketing “brand.” Seriously? (For more info on this new ego tripping idea, I suggest you read this recent article headline in The Guardian – gripping indeed.)

The geek in me can’t help but feel a disturbance in the force. We’re all connected and when something like this happens it is hard not to feel like crap. The one thing I thought immediately when I heard the news from Orlando was that the attacker was not what the media was portraying him to be. There was something lurking under the surface and it made my heart hurt. This stuff about terrorism just seemed like another smoke screen used by a lost and desperate soul willing to do anything to make others feel as miserable as himself.

To deny our truth, to hate ourselves – this is truly one of the greatest motivators for violence on this planet. Jung said this about inner denial and the shadow that leads weak minds like the Orlando attacker (I refuse to write his name) down a path of utter disregard for life.

“The change of character brought about by the uprush of collective forces is amazing. A gentle and reasonable being can be transformed into a maniac or a savage beast. One is always inclined to lay the blame on external circumstances, but nothing could explode in us if it had not been there. As a matter of fact, we are constantly living on the edge of a volcano, and there is, so far as we know, no way of protecting ourselves from a possible outburst that will destroy everybody within reach.” Carl Jung, Psychology and Religion” (1938). In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. P.25

You can’t help but notice the brutal irony of this shadow that has acted out during a celebration of pride in owning your true self.

The outpouring of love has been tremendous by so many since early Sunday morning. As I scroll through Facebook I find myself in tears again and again as I witness messages of kindness and a desire to pull together and become the greatest version of our collective self. One of those that really moved me was Jimmy Fallon’s statement regarding this devastating event.

Keep on dancing.

Fallon gave an emotional speech in response to Orlando’s tragic event which he graciously ended with “Keep loving each other. Keep respecting each other. And, Keep on dancing.”

As I became an adult one of my favorite places to dance and just be myself was a popular gay-owned bar in DC called Tracks. Tracks was the kind of place that welcomed everybody. The diversity in their events brought people from all walks of life together- gay and straight. It was a place that enabled me to simply feel safe to express myself and grow as an individual. I’m assuming the Pulse nightclub was very similar.

After 9/11 happened I remember sitting in my living room in Mt. Pleasant, DC, with friends sharing in our grief. The images on the television just escalated from the worse to the worst imaginable. Much like the Orlando shootings, I wish I could just be in a living room with those that I love, even strangers, just to know that I am connected in this grief.

It is easy to become isolated in this world of technology, but on the flip side it is also easy to feel how connected we all are in sharing our compassionate selves through words, music, pictures. Although this may not be the same as the touch of someone’s hand upon yours when you feel emotionally isolated, life is worth the big love that you infuse into it every day.

That in itself is one of the greatest actions we could take in honor of those that lost their lives this week. Being there for one another, and to keep on dancing.

Let’s Rock Big Love!

Finding the Value in the Undervalued

April 9, 2014DPChallenge, Life Coach, Perception, Self PerceptionBoundaries, DPchallenge, Empowerment, Life, New Years, Perception, Self Perception, self-love, Washington DCBorn to Be

It’s New Year’s. I’m celebrating with friends in DC. My DJ husband is spinning records, doing his usual ignore while drinking a bottle of Jack.

It turns midnight. I’m alone. Another man makes eye contact, and kisses my cheek. I realize I don’t value myself. Another negative self-perception to confront.

Dear Postal Service, Everything Has Changed!

August 2, 2013Life CoachChange, co-dependent, Creators Project, Empowerment, Life, life coach, new mexico, Self Perception, Some Idealistic Future, The Postal Service, Washington DCBorn to Be

Okay, inspiration comes in many forms. We just need to trust it when it comes, and feel with our heart what we are feeling with an intention of deep listening. What do these feelings want to say? What is this moment revealing for me in the hidden spaces of my heart? Life moves so fast, we forget about those amazing moments where something in us is pushing the envelope of what we “think” we’re supposed to be doing or where we think we’re going in our life.

I just saw this mini documentary on the Postal Service’s tour made by the “Creators Project.” In the beginning they were doing interviews with people outside a venue and someone made a comment that almost passed me by, but fortunately I was actually hearing him. They said how listening to the songs on this tour of their one and only album brought him back to the memories of that time in his life, his “angsty” high school years. He said that some of them were good, and some of them were bad (you could tell it was difficult to experience just by the tone of his voice). As I kept watching and feeling the music, I started experiencing the same thing that this post-angsty dude was talking about!

I fought my tears as I started thinking about when I discovered the Postal Service. It was 2005 and I was going through a major transition in my life. Thinking about moving out west from the only place I really knew, my home, which coincidentally was Washington DC. As I began to process my desire to move, I went through this amazing time in my life where I really discovered myself by being alone after so many years of co-dependency. I began to fall in love myself and what it was to just “be”. I enjoyed every moment I had in those quiet places of my heart.

The album contributed to a major change in my self-perception. Every day I would run and run around this middle school track near my house. Rain or shine- I was out there, feeling the air, listening to the same Postal Service album, listening to my breath change with the moving minutes. I moved to New Mexico, still listening to that same album, adjusting to a new reality where the only thing my mind had was me. I remember during my cross-country drive with my Dad he said to me he couldn’t believe I was doing it, and asked me if I was scared. This was a big deal for my Dad- if you knew him, you’d understand. He didn’t grow up in a household where people talked about their feelings. He also does not like change, and this was BIG change for his daughter, his first child, and for him.

I said I just knew that this was right, and that everything was going to work out. I will never forget his response. He said he wished he could be like me, and be that sure about something so big. I will always be grateful to the Postal Service for that album, and the change it inspired in me as it helped me to learn how to love myself and trust change. And, I will always have that memory of my Father that I will cherish and remember whenever I feel like I just don’t know.

The documentary ended with the song, Some Idealistic Future, where they sang with the audience those words that inspired so much for me, “Everything will change…ooo…ooooo”. Yes, everything has changed, thank goodness!

Monthly Peace Challenge- A Vision of Peace to Behold

July 1, 2013Compassion, Heal, Monthly Peace Challenge, Peace, Perceptionawareness, B4Peace, Compassion, Lila Downs, National Museum of the American Indian, peace, Perception, Photography, Prayer, purposeful perception, Smithsonian Institution, Washington DC, Washington PostBorn to Be

How can a photograph inspire a purposeful perception? How can a photograph inspire a new vision of peace for our world?

In September of 2004 I had the privilege of experiencing an amazing day in our Nation’s Capital- Washington DC. I grew up in northern Virginia, and at the time was working downtown at a higher education non-profit. I was a year out from a divorce and my life was finally settling while living in the District. This one particular morning DC was abuzz with a slowly unfolding plot. The opening of the Smithsonian’s National Museum of the American Indian was about to take place and the “Gathering of the Nations” was about to open up a door to peace and beauty on the post-summer Mall rarely experienced there amidst its normal chaos of traffic and partisan politics.

A magical day of festivities was planned. As I walked down the street to my office that morning, you could feel it coursing through your body like adrenaline only it was pure joy. My heart felt like it could leap from my body. Like a window was about to open to a new manifest destiny as the Nations took DC by storm. Representatives, families from the entire Nations’ tribes were gathering in their ceremonial dress on 14^th street, passing me by with a pride they have always deserved. The Washington Post had posted a picture of a sunrise ceremony and blessing that took place next to the museum and you could already see the sunlight rehearsing for a show that would move my soul later that evening.

The beginning of the magnificent sunset on the Mall the day the Smithsonian's National Museum of the American Indian. — The beginning of the magnificent sunset on the Mall the day the Smithsonian’s National Museum of the American Indian.

An eclectic, free concert in the evening was planned featuring Lila Downs whose earthiness just exudes in the movement of her body and the sound of her voice. As I walked down the Mall on the sunset’s cusp, I felt so grateful to be a part of this historic event. As me and my friend waited for Lila Downs’ performance, the sky began to dance. Soon it was like an explosion of light amplifying the energy of the day and illuminating life. Every part of my being knew it was a result of this sacred energy that was brought to DC for this unique and uplifting occasion.

The 2nd stage of this magnificent sunset.

It was a peace that our own Nation’s Capital should strive for every moment- if not for themselves, but for the people of our country that have to endure the reality of our current economic plight every day. In the Bloggers for Peace writing challenge this month we were supposed to write a letter, but really this is a short prayer and meditation on peace for not only the US and its government, but for all governments in our world. I can only hope that the memory of this landmark event and the picture of its beauty prays in the earth of the DC Mall and emanates itself into the hearts of those visiting and those that live there. A garden of tolerance and compassion is readying itself with a purpose. In my heart I will continue to strive to project a vision of this peace to our world, slowly giving rise to perceptions that are rooted in awareness rather than ignorance.

What has this post inspired for you? What new, purposeful perceptions about your present moment can you now use to create awareness in your life? Please let me know! I truly value your inspiration as we journey together.

Daily Prompt: Toot Your Horn / The Complement Man

January 16, 2013Daily Prompt, Ego, Life Coach, oneness, Perception, Psychology, Reflection, Self Perception, self-help, UncategorizedComplement Man, Daily Prompt, Ego, Life, Reflecting, Self Perception, self-help, Washington DCBorn to Be

reflections of lonely reeds in water — How am I reflecting your light today?

As a life coach and someone who helps people learn how to give themselves pats on the back for making headway in personal work, I was delighted to see the daily writing prompt today. On the other hand, I am one of those typical ironic people that also feels like I am being inappropriate for maybe “tooting my own horn.” I recall a moment in my own personal history where a great uncle figure in my family was bathing me in complements while visiting my childhood home in Virginia. It was during a time in my life where I was just developing as a girl and felt extremely insecure about being pretty enough or accepted into social groups at school. As I was basking in the light of these complements my uncle’s wife said to him that she felt like he had said enough and that I didn’t look that pretty.

Talk about a plane taking a nose dive? Crash and burn.

It is funny to me now on one level. I can watch the scene like an outsider and laugh at it like a film pointing out the hilarity of the obvious situation my ego was engaged in. I have found in life that giving complements to others in a way does toot my own horn. It gives cause to feeling the inherent love that exists in my heart because I am recognizing it in others. I feel grateful because I can step back and say- this person is so kind, how can I bring more kindness into my life and interaction with others. I recommend to everyone out there that when you see light in another person, reflect back and know that you could not see that beauty unless you had first recognized it in yourself. It is the magic trick of life- that mirror reflecting back to you your truth over and over again.

When I lived in DC, there was this guy that would hang out at the top of Dupont Circle and give praise to people as they strolled by. It was his way of earning a living. He called himself the “Complement Man”. Even though it sounds funny- everyone loved him. He made a conscious decision that if he was going to ask people for money to help him in life, he was going to do something for it- so why not divvy out relevant complements to people? I say “three cheers!” to that. How can you also complement yourself today? How can you be the “Complement Man” (or woman) in your own life or someone else”s life?