Category Archives: Mind

directions for an empowered life

Truth or Consequences?! 3 Questions to Ask Yourself on Living an Empowered Life

Empowerment, Life Coach, Mind, Perception, Power, Self Perception, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“In the present circumstances, no one can afford to assume that someone else will solve their problems. Every individual has a responsibility to help guide our global family in the right direction. Good wishes are not sufficient; we must become actively engaged.” – The Dalai Lama, at a Universal Ed for Compassion and Wisdom Conference in Sidney earlier this year.

In my meditation this morning I heard these distinct words-

“You are not a consequence.”

The first thing I had to do was find the more direct definition for consequence, and go from there.  From Dictionary.com we get:

con·se·quence  

Noun

  1. A result or effect of an action or condition.
  2. Importance or relevance: “the past is of no consequence”.

I loved the statement the minute I heard it in my heart.  The statement oozes accountability and authenticity which are primary tenants in understanding how perception plays a role in our lives.  I have often said in my writing that it is important for us to understand how to use the mind to work for us, rather than continue the charade of allowing the ignorant mind to use our precious opportunity of life.

So where do you stand?

  1. Do you see your life as a playground of choices that you get to make every day including your own self perceptions, or do you live your life as if it were a place of consequence?
  2. Do you view life as a result or effect of an action by another?
  3. Are you and your experiences the consequence of others or of your own mind?

Lots of big questions?  I know, I can’t help it!  Something I realized this morning in this meditation as part of this statement on consequence is that my whole existence is the result of a desire to help others.  The root of my existence is not to be kept and harbored but to be shared and lived with others.

We are all a result of a desire to help others.

Years ago I was watching this episode of the show ER- I loved that show.  This one particular episode Eriq La Salle’s character, Dr. Benton, had to do some volunteer work at a mobile medical station in the middle of nowhere Louisiana.  As a black man he was experiencing racism that he hadn’t normally experience, and as an educated man he himself was behaving like a classist that did not want to be there doing this assignment.  Maybe easier said- he was pissed and angry, yet these people needed medical care.  In the end of the show he had experienced a kind of spiritual awakening, where he realized how important it was for his work as a doctor to be used as a means to help people heal- that it went deeper than his ego linked with his ignorant mind initially led on.

At the end of this episode I cried so deeply for like an hour, because in my heart I could not imagine doing anything except helping people heal and I knew it was an innate part of my existence.  We are all a result of a desire to help others.  We are all a result of the desire to love ourselves wholly and in turn love others from the most expanded part of our being.  No matter what we do in this life, we affect people and every moment is an opportunity to offer kindness.  Every little act is part of being accountable and acknowledging that we do not need to be victims of consequence, but part of a life that owns our mind and how it affects the world around us.

“LET’S ROCK BIG LOVE!”™  Jessica

Pop Song

My POP Song Dilemma

Acceptance, Boundaries, Co-dependent, Ego, Life Coach, Love, Meditation, Mind, Perception, Self Perception, self-help, , , , , , , , , , , ,

I know I have my opinions about music, but there is one thing about pop music in the present moment that drives me batty- the lyrics.  And how fitting, to see this recent “Taylor Swift feminist doppledanger” created by Clara Beyer, a rising senior at Brown University, in the news creating more empowering lyrics for Swift’s music!  After living much of my life in a co-dependent fog I can’t help but notice how often lyrics are very reflective of a co-dependent state of mind, feeding a monster within our society that says “I need you” under the guise of love.  Between the neediness and the victim mentality I seem to find myself plugging in my mp3 player almost immediately upon entering my vehicle  or being that really annoying person that keeps changing stations with the hope that something listenable will magically start playing.

The ignorant mind thrives on lyrics like “This is the part of me, That you’re never gonna ever take away from me” from Katy Perry in her song Part of Me.  I mean, no one can ever take a part of you away without your general consent- hence the continuous victim droning that plays over and over again on the radio.  Most of the listeners of Katy Perry are young girls that are buying into this fake sort of empowerment, rather than learning that relationships are not about compromising your integrity to have someone in your life.

Self-Esteem_Cartoon_Streeter

In reflecting, it is difficult for me to know that other girls really believe this stuff and continue to act it out because I used to do the same thing, and it caused me a  lot of suffering.  Not everyone has the tools to walk out of the fog of these types of limiting perceptions, and they continue to teach them to their own children, hence the cycle continues.  My meditation teacher taught me that the greatest way to help the world was to meditate on my own inner peace.  I am so grateful every day for what he taught me, and will continue to work to help all by working on the healing of my very own heart.

There is this great scene in Sex in the City, the first film, where Carrie is reading Cinderella to her goddaughter and she pauses at the end to make sure the little one understands that life does not always turn out that way.  The little girl naively shouts for her to read it again.  Carrie ends the scene with “Another one bites the dust.”  It’s funny, because it is true.

Lessons learned out of my pop song dilemma:

  • Perceptions that thrive on “me versus you” are rooted in the ignorant mind.
  • I am accountable for me and how I perceive the world- no one else.
  • I always have a choice to either accept someone else’s feelings or indulge in being a victim of their feelings.
  • My self-perceptions will always reflect in the way a relationship is unfolding- the more I shift my self-perceptions into purposeful perceptions, the more my relationships will reflect these perceptions rooted in empowerment and joy.

“LET’S ROCK BIG LOVE!”™  Jessica

That’s All Happiness Is…

Attachment, Awareness, Buddhism, Carl Jung, Ego, heart, Joy, Life, Love, Mind, Perception, Poetry, Reflection, Self Perception, self-help, transformation, , , , , , , , , , , ,

It’s just the heart being free.

About 4 years ago I saw the above music video made for Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, also a spoken word artist, poet and marathon runner.  The video and poem blew me away and I knew I would never be able to get it out of my head.  Which is funny, because it is all about being in your head.  I love this video because it incorporates something very relatable to me.  Some of my attachment in this life has to do with electronic music, and combining music with imagery and profound words really gets my heart going.  I feel joy, joy, joy!  What can I say?

I love this poem by Rinpoche because it expresses the passion I have in my heart to explore perception also in a relatable way.  In the end of the video he says:

When you’re happy, I’m happy.
That’s the formula.
First you, then me.
That’s all happiness is…
It’s just the heart being free.

The ignorant mind’s primary sense of being comes from the idea that it’s just “me”.  It strives to prove every day that we are separate from one another through habitual thinking.  But when you decide to train your mind to think outside of itself, and see that everyone’s experience around us is our experience then happiness becomes abundant.  When we see happiness in others, it grows within us.  Envision a garden that thrives in the joy of others- that is our heart.

I remember coming home one night from a dinner stopping at an intersection with a homeless man holding a sign in need of assistance.  It was probably 30 degrees outside and 8:30 pm. I had nothing but a $20 bill, so I decided to just give it to him.  All I could do was cry with joy on my way home because he felt so happy.  Doing things for others changes our self-perception from being all about me, to being all about us.  This is the development of purposeful perception, and another opportunity to love from the heart.

Please share this video with others if you feel inspired by it too.

“Let’s Rock Big Love!”  Jessica